For nearly a year I have been on a weight loss journey.
I have had ups, I have had downs, and I have had plateaus galore.
The closer I get to my "goal weight" the more I'm realizing it's not enough.
I thought I'd be happy with my body at 135 pounds. Now, I'm not so sure.
While I still have a good 10 lbs. to go until I get there, 10 lbs. less isn't going to give me the image of myself I see in my head.
In my head I see this confident, thin woman. While I AM confident, I don't see myself as thin. Healthy? Yes. Thin? No.
Call it selfish, call it vain, call it what you will.
This is MY life and MY body and I want to be happy with it.
After having a baby your body isn't the same. Heck, mine's BETTER than before I had T, but I want more.
I don't want to squeeze into 8's and be happy with that. I know I can do better. I know my body is capable of more. I know I'M capable of more.
Why I chose 135 as a "goal weight" to begin with, I'm not really sure.
I think it's because that was the weight I was when I met my husband and I wanted to be that girl again.
But the truth is, even then, I wasn't happy with my weight. What makes me think I'd be happy with it now if I wasn't back then?
I am not saying 135 lbs is fat. It's not. I'm just saying that I think I can do better, and this is me re-evaluating my weight loss goals.
I'm upping the ante.
I'm getting back in full weight loss mode.
No more "I'm getting close to (previous) "goal" so I can slack a bit."
My new goal?
Now before you get all huffy on me and think that's too small (mom), hear me out.
Weighing 125 lbs. at my height of 5'6 would put my Body Mass Index at 20.17.
A HEALTHY BMI for my height is between 18.5 - 24.9.
Currently, at 146 lbs. my BMI is at 23.56.
That is on the high side of the BMI healthy range.
I'm sick of being on the high side of everything.
When I started this journey (at 198 lbs.) I had a BMI of 31.95- Obese Class 1.
So yes, I have come a long way, and I am proud of myself for it.
But I'm not done yet. I have 21 more pounds to go. I have already lost more than 50.
I know I have more in me. More sweat to give. I know I have it in me to be happy with my body.
So I'm going to get there, come hell or high water!